- Hate decisions, like to wait until only one gift is available for purchase
- Seasonal Affectation Disorder prevents you from caring about in-laws too much
- Honestly, just been pretty drunk lately
- Allergic to planning
- Really like hysterical crowds of selfish consumers
- Waiting for joints to ache, like they always do when bargains are near
- Didn’t realize knitting an X-Box 360 would take so long
- Just converted from Judaism on Tuesday
By Michael J. Weingarth


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