Dear Sir or Madam:
On behalf of the Foundation for the Future of Tomorrow, I’d like to take this opportunity to invite you to enjoy partaking in a unique opportunity to support some of the most important ongoing development initiatives going on in the world of today – and the future: of tomorrow.
Evolving from the private microfinance firm, the ‘Franklin Syndicate’, the Foundation is a 501-C, non-profit NGO globally engaged in the engaging globular happenings. We’re involved in groundbreaking, cut-of-the-edge-of-the-world experiences, focusing on trans-, pan-, and inter-national schemes; we hope that you, Sir or Madam, decide to contribute to the imminent value of potential prospects in our forthcoming strategies.
Unfortunately, I can’t fully detail the great doings that the Foundation does, as we are involved in ongoing litigation that we are confident will be settled outside of court for an undisclosed sum, to which you now have the chance to contribute. While we are legally obligated to inform you that the case in question involved children between the ages of three and six, caves, demanding manual work, and the illegal trade of human eyes, we assure you that that no synergy has in any way been lost.
If you decide to contribute to the Foundation for the Future of Tomorrow, you will leave a lasting legacy that will persist on into the perpetual future of perpetuity. Just look at some of the world leaders who have considered acting on the numerous mailings they’ve received:
-Billington ‘Trip’ Doughsbury, Esquire XII: Cookie and pastry tycoon
-The Great Gandhini:
-Ilya Fakenameovic: A famous Slav of some type
-Melinda Gates: Despite her husband’s protests
Similarly, you, too, can also in the same way join the ranks of these world leaders, too, by also contributing to the Foundation. Help sculpt the clay of tomorrow’s sculptures – today. For the future of tomorrow.
All donations must be made in unmarked bills.
By CS Van Orden